Joke thread!!!

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Old 01-27-2005, 10:25 AM
  #76  
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What's the difference between a violin and a cello?

A cello burns longer...
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Old 02-03-2005, 08:51 AM
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How are a bowling ball and a sorority girl alike?

You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter and they'll always come back for more.
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Old 02-03-2005, 08:53 AM
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Originally Posted by Ali G
How are a bowling ball and a sorority girl alike?

You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter and they'll always come back for more.

That is true Gold! Nice work.
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Old 02-03-2005, 08:54 AM
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What's the difference betweena sorority and a circus?

A circus is a cunning array of stunts.
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Old 02-03-2005, 08:54 AM
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HOORAY!!! :banana:

Bring on teh funnies!
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Old 02-03-2005, 08:55 AM
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Type fastar Dan.
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Old 02-03-2005, 08:58 AM
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What's the difference bewtween a Harley and a Hoover?

The position of the dirtbag...
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:00 AM
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What three two-letter words does Mike hear several times a week that denote "small"?

"Is it in?"
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:00 AM
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Originally Posted by Ali G
What three two-letter words does Mike hear several times a week that denote "small"?

"Is it in?"

OHHHH SNAPS!!!
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:01 AM
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What do a Divorce in Rio Linda, a Tornado in Kansas, and a Hurricane in Florida have in common?

Somebody's fixin' to lose them a trailer house.
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:02 AM
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What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers?

Mechanical Engineers build weapons, Civil Engineers build targets.
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:03 AM
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Originally Posted by Ali G
What three two-letter words does Mike hear several times a week that denote "small"?

"Is it in?"
I'm married now. "Several times a week" should be changed to "a couple of times a month."


* disclaimer: it is actually not that bad... yet.
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:05 AM
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Originally Posted by Egan
I'm married now. "Several times a week" should be changed to "a couple of times a month."


* disclaimer: it is actually not that bad... yet.
:rotfl:
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:09 AM
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What has two legs and bleeds profusely?

Half of a cat.
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Old 02-03-2005, 09:12 AM
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Finding it impossible to get laid, Ed decides to visit a whorehouse. As he is sitting in the waiting room when he notices jars of tomatoes on the shelves. Realizing that he is hungry, he opens a jar and precedes to devour an entire jar.

The next day he returns and eats another jar while waiting for his prostitute.

On the third day he asks a hooker where they got those juicy tomatoes.

The ***** replies, "Tomatoes? Those are last weeks abortions."
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