What would be the best slogan for a sperm bank attracting new patients??

"give it a shot."

 

If you think tards hugging balloons or even tards dancing is funny you should see the moves they bust out with when you dump a gallon of gasoline on them and toss 'em a lit sparkler.

 

my dad is mentally disabled =(

 

hahahaha that dancing one was funny.

 

A man goes to his physician and is shocked to find that he has been replaced by a super-computer. The computer asks him his ailments and the man says he has a sore elbow. A drawer pops out and he is asked to urinate in it. After a few bleeps and flashing lights the computer decides he has tennis elbow.

The man is annoyed and decides to get one over on this machine so he asks his wife for a urine sample. He then mixes this with urine from his dog, daughter and his son and to top it off, adds some of his sperm. He takes it to the computer-physician who again asks him for a sample. He places the urine/sperm sample in the drawer and the computer makes its usual display of bleeps and flashes before telling him that his wife is pregnant, his dog has rabies, his daughter has the herp, his son has chicken pox and if he doesn't stop masturbating he'll never get rid of his tennis elbow.

 

you're fuc*en sick!

 

What? It is not like I lit my cigar from the burning carcas or anything.

 

What's the difference between a Catholic priest and Acne?




Acne comes on a boys face after he's 13...

 

How many babies does it take to paint a room?

Depends on how hard you throw them...

 

What is 18" long, blue and drives women crazy?

Crib death

 

OMG

 

Ah, the original, the OG. I remember quite a few panties being ruffled in BAIC because of that joke.

 

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?

Slap her on the *** and tell her to get back to it...

 

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus...

 

What is blue and yellow and found at the bottom of a pool?

A baby with slashed floaties.