My girlfriend has been sweatin' me hardcore for the past month because her grandmother is about to uhh "pass" to the other side so to speak. Her grandmother has cancer, and takes a billion meds and her schedule of multiple pills a day went from a pack of a week to a pack of a month. She's trippin' out cuz she feels... pretty nerve wrecked that she could be sleeping with someone dead downstairs (any day now). Recently, her grandmother has been to the ER 3-4 times in the past month for pneumonia and other problems. She has been diagnosed as catatonic as of today (she couldn't move half her face, and now she can't speak).

She's just been on me and I can't sleep cuz she can't sleep and so how I don't know how to get her to uhh... not worry about it and just enjoy that her grandmother is fighting to be around.

 

Have a Living Funeral.

 

Nothing you can really do. Try taking some sleeping pills or have a drink or two at night since she won't stop worrying until the grandma dies, that is what i do when i know i will be kept up all night by the gf. That is her way of dealing with her grandma dying by stressing since she doesn't want to accept she is going be gone.

You can try to do the whole everyone is going die of something your grandma is old and that anyone can die in their sleep if they have a brain aneurysm it happens speech but that can end VERY bad for you.

 

Is she back home for pallative care. Sometime, the best thing to do for a love one is to let he/she go - rather than artificially extending their life through invasive care at the hospital. If that's the case, do not call EMT. Pop open some morphine and have her get rid of short of breath - that way she could die without feeling anxious or gasping for the air.
As for your girl-freind, get over it. Death is part of life.

 

can't remember where I saw the videos but i think the police can help out the living and turn them into the deceased. Atleast we will have another video to watch.

 

Dude - she's gonna be a wreck there's no way around that

It's not your decision but maybe it's time to look into hospice
http://www.hospicenet.org/

Be VERY careful about how you present this - in fact I don't know if I would bring it up at all.

As for you, go buy some Valerian Root at a natural food store. It's a natural sedative, take 1 and go to bed, you'll sleep

 

So cold...LOL....


But seriously, she's going to be a wreck for a while. Its not something people let go easily, especially when the inevitable is drawn out like that...Just be supportive.

 

Not to sound like a ***, but death is a part of life. I would spend as much time as I could with her, talk about all the great things and events that we have throughyt life.

I hope everything works out.

 

There's a lot of ways to deal with a dying loved one. Hospice is a great idea, don't feel afraid to recommend it. What hospice is, is essentially a way for family to come together and understand that they are going to be dying, they make for the smoothest, easiest and most dignified transition into death. They emphasize comfort over heroics, and they have in home nurses that come rather than taking them to the ER over and over again.

Hospice also emphasizes keeping the patient at home, and not transporting them to the hospital as they can be a lot more comfortable at home. They also give regular pain meds to ensure that the patient is in no discomfort at all.

Another thing to look into a DNR or Do Not Resuscitate order. This goes hand and hand with hospice and the dying process. If someone dies and does not have one of these, EMT's and Paramedics are held by law to attempt to revive them, unless they have a DNR. CPR is a horrible process for family to watch and makes it all way more dramatic. DNR's allow patient to pass with dignity.

A living funeral is also a good idea, we did that with my grand mother, that way everyone had a chance to say their final goodbyes while they can still be heard. Another benefit of hospice is that they have counseling services.

 

Just give her some time and be supportive. People have to figure things out like this for themselves, so all you can do is be nice and patient.