Someone will need to change one of the M’s in MMA fighting… to “Morphing.” I’m sorry, make that “Morphin.”

Because it has been reported that Jason David Frank, a.k.a. “Tommy” the Green Ranger, then the White Ranger, has officially become an MMA fighter. And I couldn’t be happier. Now I can finally take this fighting league seriously. Sure, these fighters have had years of training (ahem, and steroids) and can take down people three times their size. But I don’t take any fighter seriously unless he knows how to take out a league of Super Putties (go for the Z!)

So the question remains… who will be the first to fight the former Mighty Morphin Power Ranger in the ring? Well, I have a few suggestions. 7 to be exact. Why 7? Cause I like PRIME NUMBERS! IT’S A PRIME LIST!

So here it is! 7 Prime Opponents Tommy (Jason David Frank) Should MMA Fight!

1. BULK AND SKULL

Consider this the training match. Sure, Bulk and Skull are no challenge… they’re the Rocksteady and Bebop of the Power Rangers Universe. But nothing would be more charming than seeing the 1990s Weekday Afternoon and Saturday Morning version of Laurel & Hardy bumbling around in a steel cage, possibly in some outrageous costumes. The best part will be when JDF wins the fight, sending the dumb duo flying into Lt. Stone or Ernie’s juice bar. Then he could laugh and pause in freeze frame, while the end music plays and the credits start.

2. A NINJA TURTLE

It’s been an age-old debate of who is better in the Entertaining Children as Ninja game – the Power Rangers or the Ninja Turtles. That can now be settled in MMA. Must note, however, that the Power Rangers and the Ninja Turtles did fight before. But it wasn’t Mighty Morphin, it was in Space. And it wasn’t the Cowabunga 80s TMNT or the kick-@$$ New Millennium TMNT or even the CGI-TMNT. It was the often-forgotten Next Mutation Turtles featuring that stupid 5th girl Turtle, Venus. Yes, FIFTH GIRL TURTLE! You heard me. I hate when shows feel the need to add an unnecessary girl character. Isn’t that right, DuckTales?

ACTION: Take the Super Mario Jump for 5 more Prime List selections. And did I miss anyone?

3. LORD ZEDD

Okay, now here’s a worthy opponent. Without question, JDF has to go fisticuffs with the Best. Power. Rangers. Villain. Ever. I just want some announcer to say, “Ladies and gentleman, now entering the ring… Lord Zedd” and then that red dude’s theme music starts playing. That’d be so L33T! Watch out when Zedd fights you, dude. I’m sure Goldar will be close by with some nasty tricks. And it’ll be hard to concentrate with Scorpina as his cheerleader.

4. KIMBERLY (PINK RANGER)

Hell hath no fury like a Power Ranger scorned. Kimberly should totally fight “Tommy” and she has every reason to. All the girl wanted to do was head off to the Pan Global Games to show off her athletic prowess. And what does Tommy do? He freakin’ shacks up with Katherine, the girl that tried killing Kimberly in the first place… WHILE TURNING INTO A CAT! That’s messed up, dude. Kim’s gonna beat you up so bad.

SELF-SECOND OPINION: Kimberly did break up with Tommy for some other guy, but never said who it was. Then, in Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie, she’s out scuba diving with Jason! Methinks we found the new boyfriend. IT’S CHEATIN’ TIME! No wonder those got captured by Divatox and turned into slaves. Karma is cruel, Kim. And Power Ranger Jason… not actor Jason… should’ve known better. Some best friend. Which brings me to my next opponent…

5. JASON (RED/GOLD RANGER)

It has been hinted numerous times that there may be some rivalry between Jason and Tommy. Jason was the leader of the Power Rangers – the Red Ranger – then the Green Ranger comes along and steals the spotlight. Then Green Ranger goes away, becomes the White Ranger, and freakin’ takes leadership of the team. Then Jason (again, Ranger, not actor) leaves, comes back as Gold Ranger Zeo and regains his place on the Power Rangers throne. Then Tommy says, “Oh yeah! Well I’m gonna take the Zordon role and lead the Dino Thunder Power Rangers… AND GET A DOCTORATE, ****!” Say what you will about friendship and teamwork, these two wanna beat each other up bad! Or kiss. I can’t figure out which.

6. BRUCE LEE URKEL

Not many people know this, but Jason David Frank actually appeared in an episode of Family Matters! He played a bad guy at that, being part of a gang taking over a park. That is, until Urkel shows up with his transformation chamber and beats him up, Bruce Lee style. And if that weren’t bad enough, JDF also gets beat up by 3J. What the frak? Does anyone even remember who 3J is??? It’s one thing to be beat up by Pudgy Pig or Pumpkin Rapper, it’s another to be defeated by the voice of Sonic. Steve Urkel, watch your back. You’re about to taste ground while a Power Ranger hovers you and says, “Did I do that?”

Green and White Ranger. HIMSELF

I demand it! Jason David Frank must be cloned so that this can happen again… WHITE POWER RANGER VS. GREEN POWER RANGER!!! Tiger Power vs. Dragon Power! White Tigerzord vs. Dragonzord! Saba vs. That awesome green dagger that plays music! Da – da da – da da daaaaaa! You get the White and Green Ranger in the MMA ring, get the fight started, and play one of them cool Power Rangers background songs like “We Need a Hero” or “I Will Win” and you’ll get the MOST VIEWED MMA FIGHT IN HISTORY! 19.95! ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!!!

So that’s my Prime List. I personally can’t wait to see Jason David Frank fight in the MMA or the UFC. I know some people will see it as a gimmick, and it could be. But if he trains hard, shows his skills, and takes it seriously, it will be amazing. I just hope he doesn’t have to do one of those Power Ranger special messages at the end of every fight. Get real!