A great friend of mine just found out that his was killed in an overseas car accident while she was away on a geological trip!!!

He got news about 5 hours ago and is flipping out, talking about how he is going to end his life and that all is lost. We took him to the hospital so they could give him something for the grief... They gave him two things, one called Ativan (which is really common for anxiety) and trazadone which is a tranquilizer and will put you to sleep...


We (me and a couple other close friends) drove him home from the hospital just a little bit ago after he took the meds and even in his grief stricken condition he was out like a bulb.

I've known this guy since the 7th grade and are good friends, we always help each other out when we need it, etc... Him and his wife got married just under a year ago and like I said, she's a geologist.


My god guys, I have no idea what to do when he wakes up tomorrow! His mom, dad, and sister are all coming back into town asap but until then we are all he has. It's so awkward... I want to be there for him and all its just sooooo depressing and awkward... I dont know what to say or do... Should I take him places? Is that a bad idea? Should I just chill and keep him company and not sweat it?

I've never been put into this sort of position exactly and since he's almost exactly my age, we're real good friends, but we never share sentimental thing with each other which is why I feel so weird about it... He couldn't be anymore broken up/shattered... Like he's dead inside. It's horrible.

F', I wish he would have given me some of those tranquilizers so I could sleep

 

I am really sorry to hear about your friends loss. I would just stay with him. It may be akward but just be there until his family gets there. I couldnt even imagine what Iwould be like in his or your situation.

 

Wow, God be with him. I'm sorry for his loss.

 

So wait, his wife died? Damn bro, I'd probably end up the same way if my gf died. Sorry for his loss and yours.

If I were you, just be there with him. I had friends who lost family members, and it seems the best thing to do is just to be there. Sometimes you don't have to say anything.

 

thats rough man. I wish him the best. I dont know what I would do if I was in his shoes.

 

Dude... what is with you and bad things happening? Did you use the numbers from Lost to win the lottery or something?

As to the emotional support for your friend thing, yeah, I'm sure it will feel weird at first, but put that aside and just do what you know he needs right now. It's in our nature as humans to be supportive and nurturing when it's needed.

 

Ya i really agree. You might not have been on that level with him previously but now he is in a time of need, and your the one thats there to help him out. If he was having thoughts of ending his life the night before, I would be worried about him waking up and still having those thoughts.

Just go and hang out with him. Wait on him and just help him out with all the small things. I would maybe even hang out a little longer after his family gets there. Let him know that you will be there for him before, during, and after they leave.

 

Wow, first off I'm very sorry to hear about the horrible news. I know if something happened to my wife I would be crushed! I don't know about taking him out just due to the fact that he is in a bad place right now as it is. He might need to talk about it more before he can be in the right frame of mind. You don't want him to do something to harm himself while your out, but that's just me. I would keep a close eye on him either way you go. Again, sorry to hear about your friends situation.

 

my heart goes out to him and his family.

id be in the same boat as you are. the best thing to do is to be with him and support him in any way possible. i dont think its the time to start trying to take him out...but yeah, this would be tough for anyone to handle.

 

my prayers go out to him and her family. . .

make sure you keep in touch with him. . . people need someone there, even if they dont ask. .. .

sorry to hear that man :/

 

that really sucks, my prayers go out to him aswell...

 

Be sure to be with your friend or have your friends with him. Tradazone is an anti-depressant, it takes a few days to start working. Also, make sure that he doesn't discontinue use of it immediately, usually when people do self-discontinue an anti-depressant, he may feel even worse than the state he was in before taking Tradazone. When on this medication, he will be drowsy, the other medication, Ativan, will also make him drowsy. So when he takes both, he'll definitely be out like you said.

I wish I could offer more, but that's all I got.

My deepest condolences to your friend.

 

Thanks guys... His sister just got into town and I ended up not sleeping and just sneaking back into his house and just sat there trying to read... When he woke up all I heard was "NOOOOOOOOO!" yelled really loud and crying again. I tried playing hitman in front of him since he's a hitman fanatic too but he was just stricken with grief.

Ug, I can't even imagine this happening to me... I'd prolly off myself.

 

Its going to take a long time for him to get over this, if he does at all. Make sure he knows that you and others will always be there for him

 

=( that's horrible news ...