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Then vs. Now [1965 vs. 2006]

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Old Dec 3, 2006 | 10:51 PM
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Then vs. Now [1965 vs. 2006]

Scenario: Parents take cute pictures of their 2 year-old playing in the tub.

1965: Parents go to Walgreen's, get them developed, and put them in the child's picture album which is shared with friends and relatives.

2006: Parents reported by Walgreen's to the police, arrested for child pornography, and child sent to foster care.

Scenario: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.

1965: Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle, goes to his truck and gets his to show Jack.

2006: School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.

1965: Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends. Nobody goes to jail, nobody is arrested, nobody is expelled.

2006: Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charges them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1965: Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the school principal. Sits still in class from then on.

2006: Jeffrey given huge doses of ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his father's car and his dad gives him a whipping.

1965: Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2006: Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. Billy's sister is told by state psychologist that she remembers being abused by her dad, and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.

Scenario: Mark gets a headache and his mother gives him some aspirin to take to school.

1965: Mark's headache persists. He goes to his locker, gets a couple of aspirin and takes them at the water fountain.

2006: Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario: Mary turns up pregnant.

1965: Several high school boys leave town. Mary does her senior year at a special school for expectant mothers.

2006: Middle school counselor calls Planned Parenthood, who notifies the ACLU. Mary is driven to the next state over the border and gets an abortion without her parent's consent or knowledge. Mary given condoms and told to be more careful next time.

Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.

1965: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.

2006: Pedro's cause is taken up by state Democrat party. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files a class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum as a required course. Pedro is given diploma anyway, but ends up mowing lawns and washing dishes for a living because he can't speak English.

Scenario: Jimmy takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a fire-ant hill.

1965: Ants die.

2006: BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism. FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.
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Old Dec 4, 2006 | 05:32 AM
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ya......im gonna have to say that some of this si a little more than far-fetched
Old Dec 8, 2006 | 10:49 AM
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1965: 10th grader illegal alien Guadalupe gets knocked up by her boyfriend. She decides to go back to Mexico and start a family.

2006: 10th grader illegal alien Guadalupe is having her 4th child, and planning on at least 5 more. The school nurse can't give her asprin, but she's glad to take her out for a confidential abortion. The government keeps rewarding Guadalupe's behavior with free health care and more money$$ for each child, so life is good! She gets a brand-new furnished subsidized low income apartment in a new complex in the silicon valley. She drives a new car.
2008: Hitlery Clinton grants amnesty to every dirty law-breaking illegal alien in the U.S, including Guadalupe.
Old Dec 8, 2006 | 11:07 AM
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^ I love that the actions of an imaginary 10th grader can be compared to such a vast amount of people.

This man doesn't even want 'em.
Old Dec 8, 2006 | 08:00 PM
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Yes, I like cheese.

Last edited by HellaDumb; Dec 8, 2006 at 11:21 PM.
Old Dec 8, 2006 | 09:48 PM
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Originally Posted by HellaDumb
You must have been in the bilingual class.
eh?
Old Dec 8, 2006 | 11:22 PM
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Originally Posted by lethalpsi
eh?
wasn't sure which side of the fence you were one when I first read that....
Old Dec 9, 2006 | 12:44 PM
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Originally Posted by HellaDumb
You must have been in the bilingual class.
GTFO.
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