For those who have delt with a family member passing, how did you deal with it? My grandmother passed away this afternoon and I found out right when I got home from work. Today was going very well, one of the best days I've had with luck in a long time, but I knew today was far too good to be true. Everything was going far too good for me today until my dad called and asked where I was because of 80W traffic and all and I was on my way home and he kept persisting that I would come home instead of going out like I had mentioned. Well I had a really bad feeling about something due to some family/friend issues that had come up recently. So I go home and I step in the house and my dad tells me that my grandmother passed away a few hours ago. I honestly couldn't believe it. I knew she was pretty sick since she was in a convelesent home and couldn't live by herself and she just caught amonia (sp?) I guess it got too much for her or something. I also found out my uncle was in the hospital for a heart murmur as well a week or so ago. So hear goes some fun times I guess. I just don't know how I'll be during her viewing and her service comming up this week. I have to get a suit tomorrow and during her service I have to also be one to carry the casket. This is the first service I'll be attending. I just really hope my family doesn't get petty over possesions and ****, I honestly don't care if there's anything for me or not as its not what really matters in this kind of situation. Thanks for hearing me out guys.

 

That's really crappy, dude. I know what you're going through though. I lost my grandfather almost 4 years ago. It was 2 weeks before I left for College. He knew he was going to be passing soon, so we had a huge family dinner and he kinda said his good byes. That was pretty hard. I didn't shed a tear until his services, then I lost it. I just recommend that you surround yourself with your family and listen to the stories and memories that everyone has. I think that's what helped me the most. Anyway, my condolences, and you know if you need anything, we're here for you.

 

same thing happened to me but i was in cali and my grandfather was in texas, it sucked ***** that i couldnt be there for anything that happened. I tried to deal with the fact that he died happy and in his slep, and that he went peacefully , i wrote a poem of little memeries i sherished with him that was read infront of all my family members, even though i wasnt there physically, i was sort of still there. Mostly my wife and my friend helped me get through it.

my condolence

 

i feel for you man. i have no grandparents left, most recently was my grandfather on my dad's side about a month or so ago. that was probably the hardest to deal with. we were never really close with any of them, being a military family that moved around a LOT, but still it wasn't exactly easy to deal with any of them passing.

i know it sounds like a cliche, but what has helped me was remembering the good times and what they added to my life.

 

My very, very close grandfather died in march. Went out like a champ too. It was the fourth and final time he ever received the last rites during his entire life.

It's going to be rough for months, even a good year or more. I still think about him all the time. It's the little things that make you look back. Truth is you're never going to get over it fully. You just have to think about the good and smile.

RIP

 

i got really ****ing wasted












for a month or three

 

QFT. i did that when a good friend of mine died. i wouldnt reccomend it though. there are other ways. just being with people that make you happy usually does the trick.

 

just realized i do that regardless... uh, i went to safeway too and bought a giant novelty sized sandwich. then made suasage bread. then i went back to bed, but it was kinda a releif in my case.


when it comes to mind ****s: my cousins 7 month old baby rolled off a changing table while their sitter unlocked the door for her and her husband. baby managed to roll over the bumper bars and into a trash can and suffocated on the bag. they're jewish too and the police wouldnt release the body cause they wanted to press charges on the sitter so they couldnt bury the kid within the 48 hr thing and the coffin looked like a fedex box.

personally i plan to outlive everyone i know then die by going out into the woods and fist fighting a bear, tons of man points and no cleanup.

 

like i said, spend some quality time with Mr Daniels

 

1.
Denial [Numbness]. The body protects us from what is really happening. The experience does not seem real. We can go through the motions at the time of loss and sometimes through the time of the funeral as through we are spectators watching from a distance. This can be a stage of bargaining as well, telling God we will do or change anything if the person can be brought back. Over a period of time, reality is faced. It is important to talk about it , not to keep it at a distance with frantic activity, pills or alcohol.

2.
Anger. May be directed at the doctor, nurses, ambulance people, anyone who could have saved the person, at innocent bystanders, God, ourselves, the person who died, the clergy person or even someone else who has not lost that particular relative or loved one.

3.
Guilt. Guilt is anger turned toward ourselves. None of us is as kind, sensitive or thoughtful as we would like to be. We may feel bad about things we have said or done to hurt the person who has died. Since there is not time for apologies, we can be left with unfinished business. In the messy business of daily living, we do the best we can - and thank God for those who love us in our imperfections. Guilt can extend to our failure to see the future or to prevent the death. We can say a million times, "If only . . ." We can even feel guilty when we find ourselves having a good time or forgetting about our grief for a period of time.

4.
Depression. A heavy pall hanging over everything. In our minds nothing will ever be all right again. Depression paralyzes us. The simplest and most ordinary jobs become almost impossible for us to do. Looking forward to tomorrow or anything is impossible. This is the most difficult and frightening stage. We need to strive to talk and to keep those who seem to withdraw from us involved in daily life.

5.
Acceptance. The time emerges when we begin to believe we will make it through. That doesn't mean things will be the same as they were or that we won't miss the person any more, but it means things will be all right. We can talk about the loved one and remember them often, but we go on with life. We can find that our experience of loss can be very helpful to others facing similar losses. As we share their grief with them, we can find that contact healing for us as well.

 

i watch scrubs too season 5 :fighting0098:

 

Thank you everyone for sharing your experiences and remember them as I'm sure its tough to even want to bring up. A few of my friends called me up asking why I didn't come over or hang out and I just told them I was going to stay home that evening. I didn't have the strength to tell them and I didn't want to really bring it up, but my friend asked and I told him. Funny thing is he and irrationalX must have similar thoughts, he asked me to come over and drink lol. I didn't feel like drinking (Which I normally do on the weekends) and didn't want to get wasted or anything at all. Today I have to go get a suit and some stuff done I guess. Again I thank you all for your condolences and sharing your experiences.

 

Driving around town during night time really helped out when my grandfather passed away last year. I didn't care if it was wasting gas or adding miles, it usually ease my mind a bit. I usually drive to empty spots and park for a bit just to remenence about the past. It really helped me out.

 

traditionally my people drink all the time anyway so its my solution for lots of issues. Mr. Insomnia meet Mr. Scotch, ect ect

 

fortunately theres a bar around that corner :406602B3C068494FBF7