Need dog training advice

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Old Jul 9, 2009 | 02:45 PM
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Need dog training advice

How would the dog experts on here go about training their dog to seek out hot women? I'm thinking of some kind of drug sniffing dog training method, but how do you isolate a variable consistent in attractive women for them to seek out? I mean, given where Kramer normally sticks his head, I don't have faith that he'd notice attractive traits. Maybe just train him to look for big ***** and pray that they are below a nice face and on a nice body?
Old Jul 9, 2009 | 02:56 PM
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I had a female rottie-doberman mix named Cyprus.
She loved women, especially during that special time of the month.
This ****ing dog would stick...no, cram!...her nose into the crotch of females.
Cyprus was a crotch fiend.

I did not train her for this, so I got nothing.
Old Jul 9, 2009 | 02:58 PM
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Unfortunately what your dog finds attractive and what you find attractive will be very very different.
Old Jul 9, 2009 | 02:59 PM
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Originally Posted by ipozestu
Unfortunately what your dog finds attractive and what you find attractive will be very very different.
this is true.
Old Jul 9, 2009 | 03:06 PM
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In my situation it seems as if women are trained to seek out the dog instead. When the dog is a passenger in my old mini, the combo is like a cuteness overload - it can actually be annoying if you need to get somewhere. "Hey that's a really cute car... OH MAH GAWD A PUPPPEEEEEEEEE!!!!" Whereas my friend's plan with his classic Camaro and pit combo has turned out to be a dude magnet above all else. Sadly, I have no suggestions as treat training your dog to seek out ***** could be troublesome if not illegal (though the visuals are a blast) unless of course you have your own *****.
Old Jul 9, 2009 | 03:08 PM
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Every time you see a lady you would consider to be attractive, ask her to give your dog a treat (provide her the treat), and tell her that she would be helping you socialize the pup. Again, only do this with attractive women. After about a month, you dog should know the drill.
Old Jul 9, 2009 | 03:09 PM
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You do know dogs have poor vision and rely mostly on scent and hearing right? So unless you can train the dog to sniff out pheromones (which all women release, not just the 'hot' ones) - you aren't going to have much luck mate.
Old Jul 9, 2009 | 04:04 PM
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Originally Posted by R-Dub
You do know dogs have poor vision and rely mostly on scent and hearing right? So unless you can train the dog to sniff out pheromones (which all women release, not just the 'hot' ones) - you aren't going to have much luck mate.
Yeah, the post wasn't 100% serious It stems from a conversation at the dog park yesterday.
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