Muslim needed: (CL ad)
#1
Forester Specialist
Thread Starter
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Sonoma County
Posts: 3,985
Car Info: '98/'04 Foresters (S & XT)
Muslim needed: (CL ad)
Originally Posted by Jinn
Needed: Fake Muslim Husband
Date: 2009-11-08, 11:09AM PST
Reply to: gigs-2qsnd-1456850892@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Needed 25-30yr old boy who can act for periods of time as my pious muslim husband and entertain my concerned parents while I drink myself blind in various dive bars and ponder and pursue scientific experiments (...in that order).
Specific qualifications:
2 persons and any sort of random family member to attest to your islamic faith. Actors and lieing friends will be considered.
general knowledge of islam req'd but extensive preferred. You should be able to practice and apply in situations involving parents ie praying and praising God in appropriate islamic fashion. Real fasting not necessary cheating will be accomodated in parent contexts.Remember the ad is for fake muslims real muslims need not apply and don't waste time preaching or scolding this bad jinn.
East Indian heritage preferred...pakistanis need not apply...all others welcomed (parents' standards not mine...cept for the pakistani part)
Well groomed...think smart accomplished doctor or engineer types but not too pretty think prophet muhammed in his prime, some strategically trimmed facial hair can make you look like a very promising regular mosque attendee
Clean background...my parents maybe dinosaur in their beliefs but do actually know how to operate google search in addition they posses unnatural talent at snooping and discovering supposedly well hidden information, 24yrs of experience speaking...their extensive social circle of immigrant indian friends has a lot to do with their supernatural snooping powers
Income...need not be stable or even real..just enough to finance a few key events in this deceit escapade...decent clothes, a car would be nice, a sweet pad that we would supposedly live together in would be even better....ie enough to superficially impress my parents
Compensation:
Glamorous indian bridesgroom outfits and a wicked awesome trip ...to hell! ...With me! Hooray!!
Date: 2009-11-08, 11:09AM PST
Reply to: gigs-2qsnd-1456850892@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Needed 25-30yr old boy who can act for periods of time as my pious muslim husband and entertain my concerned parents while I drink myself blind in various dive bars and ponder and pursue scientific experiments (...in that order).
Specific qualifications:
2 persons and any sort of random family member to attest to your islamic faith. Actors and lieing friends will be considered.
general knowledge of islam req'd but extensive preferred. You should be able to practice and apply in situations involving parents ie praying and praising God in appropriate islamic fashion. Real fasting not necessary cheating will be accomodated in parent contexts.Remember the ad is for fake muslims real muslims need not apply and don't waste time preaching or scolding this bad jinn.
East Indian heritage preferred...pakistanis need not apply...all others welcomed (parents' standards not mine...cept for the pakistani part)
Well groomed...think smart accomplished doctor or engineer types but not too pretty think prophet muhammed in his prime, some strategically trimmed facial hair can make you look like a very promising regular mosque attendee
Clean background...my parents maybe dinosaur in their beliefs but do actually know how to operate google search in addition they posses unnatural talent at snooping and discovering supposedly well hidden information, 24yrs of experience speaking...their extensive social circle of immigrant indian friends has a lot to do with their supernatural snooping powers
Income...need not be stable or even real..just enough to finance a few key events in this deceit escapade...decent clothes, a car would be nice, a sweet pad that we would supposedly live together in would be even better....ie enough to superficially impress my parents
Compensation:
Glamorous indian bridesgroom outfits and a wicked awesome trip ...to hell! ...With me! Hooray!!
#12
Old School
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Union City
Posts: 14,983
Car Info: '99 RBP GM6
I seem to have seen this somewhere.....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bollywood/Hollywood
The film centres around the character of Rahul Seth (Rahul Khanna), a young, rich, Indo-Canadian living in Toronto whose widowed mother (Moushumi Chatterjee) is anxious to get him married after the freak-accidental death of his Caucasian pop singer girlfriend, Kimberly (Jessica Paré). Furthermore, the mother proclaims that the impending wedding of her daughter Twinky (Rishma Malik) & Bobby will not take place until Rahul has found himself a bride first. The pressure mounts on Rahul as he finds out that Twinky must get married to preserve the family's reputation because she is pregnant.
Rahul goes to a bar and there meets Sue (Lisa Ray). Thinking she is a Spanish escort, he hires her to pose as his fiancée. Rahul eventually discovers that Sue is actually Indian (her name is short for Sunita), and despite his initial anger at her lie, the two grow closer -- due in no small part to a confidence boost Sue gave to Rahul's tormented younger brother, Govind, who incorrectly believes that no one cares about his welfare -- and eventually consider one another a fit match. Pleased, Mrs. Seth agrees to sanction Twinky's wedding.
Rahul and Sue grow more intimate, later to share stories about their pasts. It is revealed here that Sue was once offered as a bride to the well-meaning but dim-witted prizefighter known as Killer Khalsa; offended that her parents would even consider such a match, she has been playing mischief in revenge. This mischief is not fully explained, but her liking for it is suggested by her audacity. Sue is quite immune to social norms; she speaks bluntly to all, particularly to Rocky, Rahul's driver, who she knows as a famous drag queen.
The blossoming romance is shaken, however, when Rahul is told that Sue was not only an escort, but a prostitute as well by a drunken friend at Bobby's bachelor party. Sue is so hurt that he would question her honesty and integrity that she leaves him. He is forced to confess to his family that he never really courted Sue, but merely bribed her to act the part of his fiancee. His mother is forced to withdraw her sponsorship of Twinky's wedding, due to her promise-- but she need not; Twinky's wedding has already taken place, well before the planned date.
Prodded by his understanding, Shakespeare-quoting grandmother (Dina Pathak), Rahul goes after Sue and professes his true opinion of her, and proposes marriage to her as well. Sue initially turns him down, only to be found later in the driver seat of his limo to show her acceptance of his proposal.
Rahul goes to a bar and there meets Sue (Lisa Ray). Thinking she is a Spanish escort, he hires her to pose as his fiancée. Rahul eventually discovers that Sue is actually Indian (her name is short for Sunita), and despite his initial anger at her lie, the two grow closer -- due in no small part to a confidence boost Sue gave to Rahul's tormented younger brother, Govind, who incorrectly believes that no one cares about his welfare -- and eventually consider one another a fit match. Pleased, Mrs. Seth agrees to sanction Twinky's wedding.
Rahul and Sue grow more intimate, later to share stories about their pasts. It is revealed here that Sue was once offered as a bride to the well-meaning but dim-witted prizefighter known as Killer Khalsa; offended that her parents would even consider such a match, she has been playing mischief in revenge. This mischief is not fully explained, but her liking for it is suggested by her audacity. Sue is quite immune to social norms; she speaks bluntly to all, particularly to Rocky, Rahul's driver, who she knows as a famous drag queen.
The blossoming romance is shaken, however, when Rahul is told that Sue was not only an escort, but a prostitute as well by a drunken friend at Bobby's bachelor party. Sue is so hurt that he would question her honesty and integrity that she leaves him. He is forced to confess to his family that he never really courted Sue, but merely bribed her to act the part of his fiancee. His mother is forced to withdraw her sponsorship of Twinky's wedding, due to her promise-- but she need not; Twinky's wedding has already taken place, well before the planned date.
Prodded by his understanding, Shakespeare-quoting grandmother (Dina Pathak), Rahul goes after Sue and professes his true opinion of her, and proposes marriage to her as well. Sue initially turns him down, only to be found later in the driver seat of his limo to show her acceptance of his proposal.